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1. This is another busy weekend. Yesterday we began a weekend of adoration in our church which was to be interrupted with the rehearsal for the wedding. I was able to get that rehearsal done in 1/2 an hour- record time! Of course it helped that everyone was there on time and was pretty cooperative. After that my family came and we stayed for evening prayer. Gabe and Noah served.
2. I got a call yesterday to come for a memorial service today for a little baby that died this week. I will do that before the wedding. This is my first time at a funeral for a little baby since my own child’s funeral. I hope I can offer something to the mother, if only moral support.
3. Besides the wedding and the memorial service there is also cross country practice and soccer. Sam also has a game to ref and Mr. Pete has some windows to fix for the lady down the street – so it’s a full day.
4. Cross country championships were last week. Yes, it is unusual to have the championships in the middle of the season. I’m not sure what kind of thought process went into planning that. My kids held their own, but overall the team won a lot of ribbons a couple medals and even two trophies. This is Gabe’s last year and I think he is satisfied with the experience. He is in very good shape. Izzy was disappointed not to do better, but she really focuses more on the social aspect than the actual running part. Noah however is starting to think about what it will take to win another ribbon. He has not won one in three years and now he is hungry for it. What it will take is more dedication (and maybe mom and dad getting a treadmill or access to a treadmill during the winter!)
5. Note to annuity companies – jerking around the beneficiaries is probably NOT the best way to get new customers. My mom had one account that required that we send a death certificate and fill out a claim form – which is pretty standard. I also had to get a tax waiver- again pretty standard. But it also required a letter from the probate court (luckily my mother had actual property to probate!) and an affidavit to prove mom lived where we said she did. So all of that took quite a while to get together. My sister and I dutifully did our paper work and sent it all in together – and now they are demanding to see sis’s divorce papers before they release the funds. So listen up fund managers – It’s fine to be a little cautious and I can totally see the death certificate and claim form and tax waiver thingy and maybe even the letter from the probate court, but everything after that just looks like a desperate move on your part to not let go of the funds. So the chances of me opening up an IRA with you so that I can put my heirs through this kind of torture when the time comes is nil!
6. Another interesting thing I have learned through settling all this stuff for my mom is that a lot of people don’t consider you to be dead unless there is an obituary. Even death certificates don’t necessarily cut it because they can be forged! This is probably why most newspapers require $200-$300 or more to put an obituary in the paper! another new surprise for me!
7. Someone asked me this week how I am doing with my grief. It’s a funny question although I’ve asked it myself in the past. I’m not intensely sad. I am lonely for my mother. Whenever the phone rings in the morning time I am totally surprised because mom always called me in the morning. It still has a surreal feel to it. I pray for her soul, I listen to some of her messages on the voice mail that I didn’t delete, and I relive the day she died all the time trying to figure it all out. But I’m not paralyzed by it. I guess the best answer is I’m working through it.
I did get some money from mom but have just stuck it in a savings account. Mr. Pete said that was fine with him and it turns out that is what financial expert Dave Ramsey says to do anyway after someone has passed on. That’s probably good advice.
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