How some prejudices develop?

About seven years or so ago, my son was playing with a group of friends behind our house. He was the only white child amongst a group of our African-American neighbors. All of the black kids were calling each other “niggah” in playful jest. That’s just what black kids do around here. For some reason the N-word doesn’t seem to have the same historical connotations that it does for those of us who lived through the civil rights movement.

Anyway, Calvin innocently and playfully joined in to the name calling. His friends didn’t think much of it. I think they started call him names too like “white niggah” or “cracker.”

On the way home though an older boy who had witnessed their playing didn’t take kindly to a white kid calling other black kids the N-word, even if it was just friendly comraderie. He took it upon himself to attack Calvin from behind and punch him hard in the eye. That was the first and last time Calvin was ever assaulted.

Ever since that time, Calvin has remained mostly in the house when he is home although last summer, now that he is an adult and 18 and big and strong, he did join in a few games of football on the street. But he developed a mistrust for the neighborhood, a mistrust for black male adolescents and it changed how he views the world. In fact, that may be what drives him out of this neighborhood as soon as he can finish high school and get a job. He already works in a most Caucasian town, and hangs around with white, middle-classed, suburban kids that he has been able to befriend because of he can drive and because he has a job.

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I have to say that I am trying to control similar feelings towards certain types of bible believing, Catholic-Bashing Christians. I had a certain encounter today that made me want to say, “the hell with it.” I open certain blog pages and in the first 30 seconds I can tell whether or not I would be welcomed as a sister in Christ or not. And my reactions are similar to Calvin’s. I won’t go in there. I’m not going to open myself up to that again. I am going to go the other way.

The really strange thing is that aside from religion, I probably have a lot in common with these ladies – homeschooling, married, lots of kids, politically conservative, and more. But I am starting to wall off that side of the blogosophere, save for my one portal, and feel driven more and more back into the heart of my own church, where for the most part I feel safe.