Special suffering

Just as I was afraid that I wasn’t really doing enough for Lent, that I wasn’t really participating in a special way, I received an opportunity for some special suffering. For the past week, I have had very unexpected tinnitus. A high frequency buzzing sound like a field of crickets, in my head, nonstop since last Thursday. You never know how much you take something for granted until a little annoyance like this pops up.

I’ve spent some time researching tinnitus over the past few days. It seems that quite a few famous people have it. Not surprisingly many of them are rock stars! But I haven’t been exposed to a lot of loud noises, certainly nothing like someone like Cher or Phil Collins would have experienced. It turns out Michaelangelo also had tinnitus and according to his writings, it frustrated him very much.

I, on the other hand, am becoming use to it. It seems to disappear in the shower, although the sound of the water could just be masking it. I took a decongestant but then later read that antihistamines could make it worse. I’m leaning towards more iron and taking an iron supplement as I read anemia could cause tinnitus. I’m trying not to think that it’s something serious like a brain tumor. My mother had a hugh benign meningioma removed about 8 years ago. Come to find out that her grandmother’s family, (my greatgrandmother) has brain tumors sprinkled all over their family tree.

I’m trying not to worry about it. They say when you hear hoof beats you should think horses, and not zebras. But dang if sometimes it’s not a zebra!

This does however, give me a different perspective on the Lenten experience. Maybe it’s just what I needed.

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