Last week was my son’s Junior High Camp at church. They had a blast!!!
On Thursday, the kids went to a local water park complete with wading pools, wave pools, water slides, inner tubes, junk food… the whole summer, splashy fun package. Literally good clean fun!!
I dutifully showed up at church at the appointed hour to pick up my young water monkey and I arrived just as one of the first car loads of kids started arriving back. One of the first youngsters I saw was a young lady, probably an 8th grader or a very tall 7th grader. This girl had a long frame – probably 5’5 and 85 to 90 pounds soaking wet. Yet she had the beginnings of a very girlish figure with some waistline definition, curvy hips and breast buds. I don’t think I could call them breasts yet because I’m not even sure they could fill up an A cup yet. Still she had them covered under probably 3 square inches of material each tied together by not more than a yard of string in what I am certain she considered to be appropriate beach wear. I was stunned.
Yet, she very casually and with no shame whatsoever came up to speak to the DRE who was waiting for the kids with me and she chatted a bit about what a good time they had and who had left, and who broke the rules about checking in etc. And then the unbelievable happened. She hopped on her bike – and rode home. By that time there were a few more moms there and other kids popping out of the cars and yet as she started down the road I could have kicked myself for not shouting, “Wait, come back! Put on a T-shirt!!!!”
When my son finally arrived I drove down the road where I saw this girl ride her bike and when I was satisfied that there were no bikes on the side of the road where she had been abducted by a sex pervert, I went home. No news of an abduction or rape the following evening or the next morning also alleviated my fears.
My own reaction bothers me. I am usually very outspoken. And the entire time that young lady was there, mostly naked, I felt very uncomfortable. I felt uncomfortable for me, I felt uncomfortable for the young guys who were coming back but who had already probably seen her naked at the water park. I guess I somehow thought someone else would tell her to put on a t-shirt, or that she would do that herself, or that her mom would come and get her. It was beyond my imagination that it would ever be considered OK for her to ride home, alone, with her body mostly exposed.
But what also bothers me is that in this Catholic setting, I appeared to be the only one bothered by this. No one else even batted an eye about it. My son, sweet Sam, hadn’t even noticed her. He was more enthralledwith his buddies, water fights, and riding the wave. Next year however, I am certain this will be a different story.
Interestingly, The Old Oligarch has had this topic of female modesty (or lack thereof) as a prominent theme on his blog this week and has taken some heat for it. You can read his very well written article here and here
The old Oligarch also references the blog of a young woman, homeschool graduate and attending Christendom College, who writes the her own thoughts on the subject here I’ve added Theresa of Domestic Order to my blogroll too by the way.
Theresa recommends the book Dressing With Dignity by Colleen Hammond. Here is a small excerpt from that book:
Because men are subconsciously very talented at reading a woman’s body language. If they see a woman who dresses with dignity and who carries herself with grace and femininity, they pick up on that. They take their cue and approach us with the respect, reverence, and honor our gender deserves. It’s also more enjoyable for a man to chat with a woman and appreciate her intelligence when she is dressed tastefully, because he’s not distracted by her body.
When a woman dresses with dignity, it appeals to a man’s chivalrous nature. Femininity touches a man’s heart and appeals to what is best in him. It makes him a gallant knight!
I’m printing all of these articles out for further reference. I’m going to be sure there is a modesty dress code next year or my sons won’t be participating.
Oh I think that is so beautiful and Mr. Pete agrees. This is what I want for my daughter as well. I don’t ever want her riding around on her bike with her breast buds tentatively covered by a wish and a prayer with some other other poor bystnading mother praying that she doesn’t get hassled or worse because she is dressed so immodestly!!
By the Way, Ms. Hammond’s book is very affordable, only $5.49 prepublication. You can read a chapter on line too. I have some nieces who are very nice girls, and I’d like to keep it that way. I think I have found their Christmas gifts!!
ADDENDUM: It appears Ms. Hammond has a blog too! Here it is http://dressingwithdignity.blogspot.com/
Please feel free to leave a comment under the posting, or sign my Spiritbook (guestbook). You can chat with me on the tag board to the right!
